Comic books have been around for a long time. Hey, did you know I WRITE one? You didn’t? Then how’d you get to this site? Hmmm…Anywho, they’ve been around for a bit, which means that comic book characters have been around equally as long. Stands to reason, right? Well, just because a character has been around for a long time, it doesn’t mean that they’re really a good character. I mean sure, there’s probably SOMETHING redeeming about them as characters, but really, when ya get down to it, there’s not a whole lot going for them. It’s kind of like, they ARE their job, and nothing else. That kind of sucks. It just means that outside of action scenes, there’s nothing really to talk to them about. So, let’s see how many people I can piss of right here…

Wolverine. I can’t stand this character. Now, as far as Marvel seems to think, he’s the GREATEST THING EVER. How can you tell that? Well, you ever been to a comic book shop? If not, I’ll wait. Waiting. Just waiting. Okay, you there? Good. now go look at the Marvel section. Just start looking at the covers. Seeing a pattern? Wolverine is on like 1/4 to 1/2 of all the goddamn covers. Did he suddenly gain Nightcrawler’s ability to teleport? How the fuck is he everywhere at once? Clones? I dunno, maybe. I doubt it, but given all the shit THAT character has apparently done over the years, it’s a bit more surprising to think of there NOT being a Wolverine army out there. But what is he like out of combat? Well, he grumbles a lot and he loves telling everyone he meets that he’s “the best there is at what he does, and what he does isn’t very nice”. That’s about it. Honestly, that’s all there is to him. So, is that interesting?

No, it really isn’t. Not in my humble opinion, at least. Hell, what’s he like when he’s in combat? Hmmm, get angry, pop the claws, annnnnnnd…done. That’s it. Oh wait, another fight? Rinse and repeat. This isn’t all that interesting. Now, that’s not to say that someone that focuses on melee combat can’t be that interesting. Look at The Hulk. Yeah, The Hulk. He’s about as melee focused as it gets, but at any given time he could pick up a train and use it as a pair of nunchaku. Or he might just hit you with a building. Or he could cut a fight really short and punt your ass to the Sun. He can do all these things and more. See, now THAT is interesting. I guess for me it isn’t even the fact that Wolverine is a rinse and repeat character, it’s more about how Marvel feels about him.

Let’s take a quick look at that whole “best there is at what he does” bullshit. Now, you’ve gotta be on some CRAZY ego trip to consider yourself the best there is at killing people in a world populated with superheroes and villains. So, is he? Is he the best at killing people? I know he’s been alive for like what, 2 centuries or something, but does he really have the biggest kill count in all of Marvel? I kind of doubt that. Let’s think of some other Marvel characters that kill people. The Punisher. Elektra. Sabertooth. Deadpool. Venom. Carnage. Honestly, I’d say any one of them are better killers than Wolverine is. Hell, Frank Castle  and Elektra Natchios don’t even have any super powers, and I’m sure they have higher body counts than Logan does. So is it that the character himself, that is Wolverine, is full of himself, or could it just be that Marvel comics WANTS him to be the best character out there, and therefore he’s written like the most ego-tastic douche out there? Honestly, I’d say it’s the latter.

Really, it’s okay for a comic book company to be amped up about a character they love. I love all the characters I’ve created, and in time there will be more for me to love as we progress with our business. But I would never presume to tell you, the reader, that this one character is the best because shut up he is. But Marvel has come up with like thousands of characters. Seriously…thousands. So it seems a little silly to just pick one and say “This guy is the best and we’re gonna put him on every fucking team there is and shove him down your throats till you love him”.

Whatever. I guess that’s one of my biggest problems with the character. I don’t like being told I have to love this guy because the creators love him, and it seems that that’s what has been going on with him for a long time now. Unlike some of the other characters I hate, at least this one has a conflict in his life. It’s cliched as hell, the whole world hating mutants because we’re all retarded and we just roll that way, but at the very least, it is a conflict. If you guys don’t mind my ranting and raving, I’ll talk a little bit more about characters that really suck in my opinion. Let me know what you think.